Creating Suspense

[donutsweeper]

Another writing/reading question for people.

What are your opinions on creation suspense/tension by using exposition to show something outside of what the characters are aware of? For example:

Neither of them noticed the man on hill, watching their every move.

In visual media this is quite powerful, usually done by shifting the camera behind a bush and watching the heroes for a minute through that perspective (possibly with the slightest hint of someone or something pushing some of the branches out of the way.)

Is it a jarring effect in prose? Does it depend on the overall POV of the story?

Comments

[donutsweeper.livejournal.com]

In fanfic it tends to be the big ol' flashing light of DOOM

[tejas.livejournal.com]

YES! Granted, I've seen some that worked. Maybe not as well as they could have, but they were in the range of well-done. But then there are the others where you *know* they picked first person because it was an "easy way" to express the character's emotions. What they forget is that there's so much more than just emotion going on inside people's heads.

[donutsweeper.livejournal.com]

like anything, it can and has been done well. but, omg, the badness can burn

[tejas.livejournal.com]

LOL! Yep! Lotsa burntyup fic out there. :-)

[donutsweeper.livejournal.com]

I wave my wand at them.

Sardoodledom: mechanically contrived plot structure and stereotyped or unrealistic characterization in drama : staginess, melodrama

[tejas.livejournal.com]

LOL!! I love it!

[donutsweeper.livejournal.com]

it encompasses so much in fanfic

[tejas.livejournal.com]

So much that shouldn't exist. :-)

[donutsweeper.livejournal.com]

speaking of which, I found it humorous that the person who lambasted the requests over at ncisficfind, bemoaning the lack of normalcy, plot, depth etc, has since asked for genderbender AND alien mpreg fic. Interesting view of what should be normal for Tony....

[tejas.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, I tried to read the alien mpreg. It was *horrid*! And this from someone who's written mpreg. I couldn't finish it.

[donutsweeper.livejournal.com]

I didnt even try. Mpreg isn't a squick of mine, but it's rarely done well enough for me to accept the premise.

[tejas.livejournal.com]

I couldn't even get to that part of it. ;-)