donutsweeper: (Default)
donutsweeper ([personal profile] donutsweeper) wrote2007-11-20 11:02 am
Entry tags:

A Pair of Jacks, reposted

After much deliberation I am reposting the drabble that caused all the ruckus, unaltered (except for punctuation corrections, thanks [personal profile] unfeathered); I'm even including the original author's note.   I'm the first to admit the premise is a bit cracked, even for me, but after the Doctor's line in Utopia, I didn't think that it was too out there.  I understand that it's not something everyone will be comfortable with, but I guess I hadn't quite expected how vehement the opposition to it might be.  I am not going to disable comments, but request that no one send me emails or make comments about the questionable nature of my choice of subject matter, my morals or the state of my soul.

I appreciate the comments and emails of support I received from my LJ friends as a result chaos, you guys are truly amazing.  The funny thing about all this is, that after rereading it so many times I still don't mind the premise, but feel that it's a tad clunky and just doesn't flow the way a drabble should.


Title:  A Pair of Jacks

Pairing/Warning/Rating: Jack/Jack, none, rated PG
Word Count: 100
Summary: Owen presses the wrong button...
Author's Note: My apologies and an extreme crack!fic and 'no liquids allowed while reading' warning


Owen stared wide-eyed at the sight in front of him.

“Owen...”  the Jacks called out in unison.  “What did you do?” 

Jacks.  There were two Jacks.   “I....”  The machine he’d been monkeying with slipped out of his hands. 

“Careful!”  they screamed, grabbing it before it could hit the floor.

“I....”

“A Thoracxian splitting laser?”  one Jack said.  “It’ll be four hours before it recharges.”

“At least the recombining feature’s intact,”  the other pointed out.

Shock finally caught up with Owen’s brain and he fainted.

“Hmmm... four hours to kill.  Shall we?” the Jacks suggested as they quietly slipped down to their quarters.

 

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 05:26 pm (UTC)(link)
...What the hell's supposed to be objectionable about that?

Also, it's cute.

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 05:36 pm (UTC)(link)
the ending- how presumedly Jack's gone off to have sex with himself.

Apparently I'm going to hell for suggesting it. And it wont be a pleasant trip.

(no subject)

[identity profile] rustydog.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 18:17 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] phoenix64.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 18:28 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] badwolf36.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 18:45 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:10 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:20 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:24 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:25 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:26 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:28 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:29 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:29 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:33 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:36 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:38 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:39 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:45 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:46 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:50 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:52 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 00:08 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] fandom-me.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 00:09 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 00:14 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_medley_/ 2007-11-20 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Bwahaha! That is funny! ...And completely harmless, as far as I can tell. ::boggles::

"Only man you're ever going to be happy with." ...I mean, I don't see the difference, really.

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:30 pm (UTC)(link)
::boggles with you:: Thanks O evil one

[identity profile] jadesfire2808.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 05:33 pm (UTC)(link)
*grin* Cute. Because really, what else is Jack going to do for four hours with "the only man [he'll] ever be happy with"?

And okay, there's some abused speech punctuation in there, and if you're not 100% happy with the construction, fair enough, but there's nothing objectionable that I can see. Maybe you should write a full fic from it ;)

You do realise that we're all going to be watching this thread like hawks, ready to jump on the next person to troll it, don't you? :D That's what your flist is for! Good to see it (and you) back *hugs*

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 05:54 pm (UTC)(link)
punctuation errors? how shocking. Tell me what and I'll fix them.

unfortunately it wasn't just comments, but emails as well the first time around. *sigh*
unfeathered: (JB method)

[personal profile] unfeathered 2007-11-20 05:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, I'm so glad you decided to repost it! I was so upset that this might have really put you off writing. Glad you're back! Missed you last night! :-)

And I still love this and it still reminds me of Anya and the two Xanders in The Replacement. *g*

[identity profile] rustydog.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 06:19 pm (UTC)(link)
it still reminds me of Anya and the two Xanders in The Replacement.

Hee! That's a great point.

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 18:45 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:16 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:24 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:33 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-21 10:10 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] rustydog.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 06:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Aw, I like this even more, the more I think about it. And if the Morality Police don't have anything better to do, that's just pathetic. ::nods firmly::

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:28 pm (UTC)(link)
*g* thanks

[identity profile] chatona.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 06:42 pm (UTC)(link)
I like it *bounces* 's fun and very cute and oh, come on. It's crack and crack!Jack would so totally do himself. So there. I really don't see anything wrong with it.

*reads over again*

Nope. Still don't see it. All it does is make me giggle. And as far as I know, that doesn't lead to the end of the world as we know it. I've been known to giggle from time to time. So it's all good.

[identity profile] aeron-lanart.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Loved it the first time, and still do. And it seems an appropriate place to quote Voltaire (the goth guy not the French poet)...


I'm goin to Hell, in a handbasket.
Oh please don't pray for me.
No I don't need to be saved, of the devil I ain't afraid.
There ain't nothin he can do that ain't already been done to me.

I'm goin to Hell, in a handbasket.
And I'll have good company too.
'Cause If I was so bad, than there's no need to be sad.
'Cause everybody else will be there too (Including You).

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:14 pm (UTC)(link)
excellent! Going to hell in a handbasket doesn't sound so bad when you put it that way

[identity profile] kensieg.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 08:08 pm (UTC)(link)
lovely!

[identity profile] asrai99.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 08:56 pm (UTC)(link)
How on Earth is this offensive? This is *fandom*. Everything goes if you warn people about it, and you definitely did. Also, considering that Torchwood is in the same universe as Doctor Who where graphically explicit porn involving various incarnations of the Doctor is a fanfic category all of its own all accusations that might have been made against you are, frankly, ridiculous.

I for one liked it.=)

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks, I'm not suer why it was so offensive either.

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Glad to see this back up! It's thoroughly harmless. Jack would definitely shag himself, given the chance. The Doctor more or less said so himself. It's something that should be explored more in fic, not less... In fact, I vote we start a Jack/Jack (Jack/Jack/Jack? Jack/Jack/Jack/Jack?) fic fest!

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:24 pm (UTC)(link)
I vote we start a Jack/Jack (Jack/Jack/Jack? Jack/Jack/Jack/Jack?) fic fest! my brain hurts now :)

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:26 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:34 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[personal profile] unfeathered - 2007-11-20 23:37 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] smithy161.livejournal.com - 2007-11-20 23:48 (UTC) - Expand
morgynleri: mostly pink with yellow and light blue background with black text reading 'criticize by creating' (ninth doctor)

[personal profile] morgynleri 2007-11-20 09:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, this is lovely! Very cool, and wonderfully cracktastic. *bookmarks*

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:27 pm (UTC)(link)
aw thanks! *blushes*

[identity profile] hellenebright.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 09:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Put it this way sweetie, if your drive-by troll is going to heaven...

I WANNA GO TO THE OTHER PLACE!!!

I mean, you didn't even say what the two of them were doing. They could have been playing chess, or making cookies, or,,or

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 11:26 pm (UTC)(link)
I mean, you didn't even say what the two of them were doing. They could have been playing chess, or making cookies, or
that's the funny thing, I nearly always leave it open. I think, out of everything I've posted, I didn't fade to black at that part twice.

(no subject)

[identity profile] k-haldane.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 11:42 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] laurab1.livejournal.com 2007-11-20 10:32 pm (UTC)(link)
**smites the troll**

What's wrong with that? It's cute, and it's *exactly* what Jack would do. And if someone can't see that, what are they doing watching the show in the first place?

[identity profile] pherber-m.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
Bwahahaha - Oh, Jack *so* totally would, too! And I wanna watch - yum!

[identity profile] k-haldane.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 01:45 am (UTC)(link)
Where on earth did you post this that it caused a fuss?

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 01:46 am (UTC)(link)
oddly enough, it was only posted on my journal, not to any of the comms

(no subject)

[identity profile] k-haldane.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 01:49 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] k-haldane.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 02:14 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

[identity profile] k-haldane.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 11:39 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] matsujo9.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 04:54 am (UTC)(link)
I'm so glad you decided to repost this because I didn't get to read it the first time around and ... I love it! I think it's cute and amusing and and and *kicks troll*!

Also, did you see this: http://pixelism.livejournal.com/74949.html ?

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 04:56 am (UTC)(link)
It is wrong that reading that makes me incredibly happy?

(no subject)

[identity profile] matsujo9.livejournal.com - 2007-11-21 05:01 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] the-dark-side.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 04:59 am (UTC)(link)
first, I'd like to thank you for putting the 'no liquids allowed while reading!' warning, because I don't think my computer would've liked a shower.

second, I'd just like to reiterate the fact that, if anyone objects to THIS fic, they shouldn't be in the TW fandom. seriously. I don't know if you read the recent interview with JB in BOYZ magazine, but he said something about being embarrassed by the amount of prejudice in the U.S. right now, and this is exactly the sort of thing he was talking about. some people are just too thick to realize there is a LOT more to this world than sex, and a lot more to love or hate about a person than with whom they have sex. sometimes, I'm kind of embarrassed myself to be a citizen of this country (but then I meet the 500 other awesome people from the U.S. hanging about in the TW fandom and I remember why I stick around).

third, I finally convinced PhotoBucket to upload the icon I made *mumblemumblePhotoBucketmumblemumble*. I don't know if you or anyone else had the same problem, but here is a PhotoBucket friendly version (apparently I had some weird setting checked on my GIF maker).

Image

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
I have no idea if the idiot was american or not, but *grr* and *pfft* to them. Thanks again for the amazing icon I ♥ it!

[identity profile] darthhellokitty.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 05:15 am (UTC)(link)
How could ANYONE possibly object to this? It's classic! Classic crack, but classic!

And of COURSE he would do it.

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
And of COURSE he would do it. see, that's exactly what I thought! :)

[identity profile] jadekirk.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 11:54 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, fantastic!

pair of jacks

[identity profile] amdavisuk.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 04:15 pm (UTC)(link)
hi donutsweeper, thanks for posting this fic, you really made my day, already know what the 2 "jacks" will be doing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!smex!!!!!!!!!:)

Loved it!!!!!!!!!!, yay take that crazy commentor, there's nothing wrong with it, and it sounds as though you had one crazy bitch commenting before (cant remember exactly but sounds like one that started christian-like nasty comments on other fandom fanfic posts last year.) Ignore them, dont like dont read, its as simple as that.
anyway thanks for posting, loved reading it, sorry that you've been targetted again wtf is up with that person...
Much respect and admiration (sorry about grammar and spelling)
amdavisuk

Re: pair of jacks

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 06:02 pm (UTC)(link)
thanks for the support and I'm glad you liked it!

[identity profile] adafrog.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 04:25 pm (UTC)(link)
bwaaa hahahahaha

[identity profile] shadowhwk.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 04:27 pm (UTC)(link)
I. Really have no idea what even the most prude of prudes that ever pruded could object to in this drabble. Sure, if you know the characters, you can take a guess at what the Jacks will do for four hours, but he's *Jack*. He just would.

Don't stop writing. Don't let the a-holes keep you down.

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 06:06 pm (UTC)(link)
thanks, I'll try not to :)

[identity profile] gonewithoutjam.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 07:21 pm (UTC)(link)
This is such a cool idea. You know, if it hadn't been for all the fuss I'd never have found this. So in a way I'm glad people are idiots sometimes, though sorry someone had to be an idiot at you.

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-21 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm glad you liked it

[identity profile] mad-jaks.livejournal.com 2007-11-22 01:23 am (UTC)(link)
Are they perhaps down there playing Strip Jack Naked?

What??
It's a card game! It's also known as Drain the World Dry and a whole load of other names I can't remember right now *g*

Honestly nothing wrong with this as far as I can see *hugs* you for letting us all see

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-22 01:25 am (UTC)(link)
Strip Jack Naked? Drain the World Dry? I've definitely been playing the wrong kinds of card games! :)

(no subject)

[identity profile] mad-jaks.livejournal.com - 2007-11-22 01:38 (UTC) - Expand

[identity profile] padawanpooh.livejournal.com 2007-11-23 08:50 am (UTC)(link)
*waves* Just got this link from [livejournal.com profile] mad_jaks - reading through the threads I can't believe some troll er..trolled you for this- it's lovely and as many others have said, exactly what Jack would do ;-)

I really hope you won't let one stupid twit put you off posting.

*HUGS*

[identity profile] donutsweeper.livejournal.com 2007-11-23 04:02 pm (UTC)(link)
aww, you have the best icon ever! And thanks for the show of support. Glad you liked it

Page 1 of 2